trenchcoatedly | 011 + DO NOT LET THE SUN GO DOWN ON YOUR ANGER [VIDEO]

[Observe: one VERY affected Castiel. That usually passive face? A sulk. The epic sulk of a teenager who hasn't gotten what he wanted, as a matter of fact.]

Okay, look, boat.

Here's something that like, ticks me off. A lot. Seriously, a super lot.

Everyone just buys the whole multidimensional boat thing. That's totally sensible! Like, makes absolutely perfect sense! Seriously! No one ever like, questions this? I mean, to makes perfect sense. But I'm a cosmic being. Millenia old. Could squash you all like bugs. So this kind of thing, it's like, you know, whatever.

But! The fact that I'm an angel - oh, that's the unlikely part. Come on, really?! You can suspend your middling human disbelief in, like, "multidimensional boat" but "messenger of God" is what gets you? Seriously, how does that even make any sense? Half of you already believe in God! So believing in me should be easy! But no, not for me. I have to prove myself. And then half of you don't believe me anyway!

None of you understand me.

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Because, uh, I was kind of made to do this? And, like, everything else I screwed up really badly at? So, you know, even if this kind of sucks sometimes, it's what I do. So, seriously. That.

He's not a shithead. We just don't get him, you know? He's got big plans. Secret plans.

Yeah? What makes you so sure he ain't just stringing us all along with those big secret plans of his?

Well, then what's he stringing us along for? Or, to, whatever. He wouldn't do that.

Nothing, that's what. Maybe he got tired of whiny little angels and decided to call it quits.

Look, if he needed a day off or had to leave Heaven or take a break or whatever, I'm sure it's just part of the Plan. Because, you know, God. And the Plan. He figured it out, okay? Because he's God.

Yeah, sure. You know, we might be better off with him gone, if all the shit going on in the world is a part of his Plan.

That's totally not true. God's good, and he means well, and look it's not my fault if humans can't figure out how to love God. They can be real great, but you guys are just so seriously stupid sometimes. Like, how do you even manage to both harness electricity and murder each other?

First of all, you can kill people with electricity.

And second -- you're tryin' to tell me we're the assholes and God has nothing to do with it? Bullshit.

What about diseases? What about natural fucking disasters?

Yeah, but I don't. You do. Shoot each other. Murder each other. Torture each other.

Also, you could cure those diseases if you started caring about each other and stopped swimming in your own profits.

Hey, fuck you. We do cure diseases and we do fucking care about each other, but the world is built on survival of the fittest, so that's what we try and do -- survive.

Yeah, we make mistakes, we make bad ones, but don't tell me the game isn't rigged against us.

You can either help everyone or slaughter the weak, all right? You don't get to have both. Don't blame me. If wealthy humans wanted to save the rest of their people, they could, you know. I think so, at least. So, seriously, don't
get on me, and don't get on God. He gave you free will. I guess you picked that to massacre each other. That's depressing.

Stacked against you? Are you kidding? God gave you everything. He gave you creativity and imagination and choice and whole brilliant, beautiful planet. He gave you all these options and choices and room to grow. He gave you each other. You got everything.

Survival of the fittest ain't about slaughtering the weak, dumbass, it's trying to keep from getting slaughtered when the whole world is bent on chewing you up. The fuck would you even know about it? Your lot doesn't have to deal with any of this shit.

God gave us dick. He threw us into the savanna and left us to fend for ourselves. If he even existed to begin with.

No. We never grew and, you know, evolved into something greater. We've always been the same as we always have been. We're stuck. We will always be as we are. That is not a good thing. That you can grow and evolve and change - that's a gift. A gift you, obviously, don't understand. So, whatever. Stomp on it. See if I care.

He existed. He made me! He made you! He made your planet!

Wah wah wah.

So you're stuck being a little girl with wings for eternity, looks like. And his gift to us was evolution? Yeah, real goddamn convenient.

You're so stupid. No wonder you're so miserable and angry at everyone.

Go cry to mommy. Or daddy, if you can find him.

Bet your family's like, so flawless, huh?

Don't you talk about my family.

[ They're not flawless. Also dead. :c ]

Oh, so it's like, okay for you to be mean about my dad, but I'm not allowed to talk about yours?

Your dad is a celebrity, and he fucked the whole lot of us over. So yeah, that's the way it works, Princess.

Well, I bet your dad sucked too.

[ He snorts. ]

Not as bad as yours.

Yeah? Well, guess what. My dad made you.

Bullshit. And he wouldn't take credit for me if he did.

Um, that's kind of, you know, part of making everything? Making you.

(no subject)

maybebatman - 2012-04-29 16:20 (UTC) - Expand

trenchcoatedly - 2012-04-30 06:11 (UTC) - Expand